Unfortunatly i was not present for the guest speaker, so im not able to add quotes from that, but i will do my best with the interview i conducted of my mom.
Well i interviewed my mom, and im not gonna add it all on here but i will talk about the important things i got from it. First off she talked to me alot about her childhood, not the easiest. Coming from a family in Ecuador, where everyone knows everyone and her parents were respected, there was not much she could have done. Having 9 brothers and sister, and prefrences over the boys caused a gender role division, in which the women in the household, no matter the age, had to cook clean and keep their grades up. I wont go into details about her childhood but i do want to tie it back to what people say about childhoods and parenting.
My mom though in her childhood experienced this, has never been one to ¨teach us lessons¨ by rasing her hand. She believed this was not the way to go, that problems would just rise due to it. She was the kind of mom that would sit us down, talk to us and explain the situation, what we did wrong ,why she didnt like it and many times the flaw she could have possibly done to contribute. By doing so she allowed us to open our eyes to the bad things we did and change them so in the future we could be in a way, better.
She was never one to make us learn, instead she helped us grow, which i believe is great. She never put stress on us at a young age, though of course as we got older we were taught just how important grades and learning are. One thing i belive most parents should do is allow a child to grow and develop in the wayt hey are meant to. Allow them to be themselves and learn by themselves , not by playing a dvd that will help them be advanced.
Parenting seems so hard, but why should it be? its a s though now we parent ourselves. We are taught and teach ourselves what is wrong and right, we have many many ideas of the way one should act so why would it be hard to pass these things along to someone we love, such as our kids.
I will agree that one way of parenting is not the exact way to go, but do parents ever fail? Did my grandmother being so harsh on her kids fail? i dont think so. My mom didnt turn out that way , my mom is the complete opposite , so why do we sometimes blame childhoods for things adults do? Can we honestly say that a parent of a killer was the one who did wrong? What if the parent did its best to be the best parent for this person?
When thinking about it parenting can be sort of controversial. One person can see a parenting skill as wrong, while another seees it as completly fine and the way to go. At this time the idea of parenting becomes so complex, and the stress of it grows. We are teaching and building up our future, the kids who will become someone in the future, corny but true. We come to this idea that we MUST be the best parents, we must be the perfect parents, when that doesnt even exist. So what do we do, i cant talk for everyone but im very confident in the way i will parent my kids, i know that the way i will choose to do so will be a way that will make me proud and make me see the effort i will put in it.
Monday, May 24, 2010
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
H.W 57- Parenting 101
I dont believe there is an exact way for kids to be parented. I do believe though that there are different things that should go into parenting, love, care, enjoyment, happiness, education, and any more. I know when i have kids i will probably follow the way my parents raised me. what i love about how i was raised was that it was in a pretty tight family, its big, but we are all close. My mom has 9 brothers and sisters , and i was raised around most of them , making us all have different but strong bonds. Also the fact my mom raised me as thinking of her as a best friend has been the best thing she could have done. It has given me support,love , and encourgement (also basics to parenting i believe)
If i was in that position , i cant say i will follow a certain routine. I dont have this certain idea and am stuck with it, i guess i would be open to different ideas. One thing i do know is that i have this idea of what is wrong and right. Whne it comes to children, i would teach them to respect and be respected, to be unselfish, to be able to help others and think about others needs , as well as their own. I would want my kids to be happy , to be intelligent , and to know how to love and recieve love.
Its hard when we think about it. So may ideas so many options which one should we follow. Should we allow kids to be independent and get their way or should we out restrictions. Speaking formyself i dont believe kids should have there way 100 percent, they shouldnt be spoiled.They need to know the valause of some things, they need to know what it means to have something. Sure we can please them a little but honestly, i dont want my kids to end up being brats. i will teach my kids how to be humble and sweet and most importantly thankful.
With all that being said i do believe that parenting will come naturally, as it did with my mom whom i belive has done a great job. Parenting isnt a subject we need to learn and study for, its something we should love doing , enjoy doing and do it not always based on what a book says.
I read ¨When Parenting Theories Backfire¨ first off this article was very funny. Not only were the outcomes of following the technique funny, but so was the idea that someone would actually think something like this would work or be useful. First i would just like to say that i dont understand why many people think that when it comes to things such as parenting, which i know would be stressful, intimidating, and seem so hard , they believe that following what a book says will be the right way to go. Parenting as i said before should come naturally because you should do what you think is right, and have seen it as being right, based on the way you were raised and etc.
The ideas behind this technique is giving kids option, now im not saying you shouldnt give kids options, but really now? what in the world will choosing a yellow cup over a red one do to a 2 year old??? i find that hilarious actually. With that being said , i would think that parents would realize that this technique would be a recipe for disaster. Honestly yes kids are smart and comeone when given the option of two choices they will definetly go for the third unspoken of choice, the third choice you ha dno intention of bringing in and gives them the authroity you think you are fooling them into having.
i dont believe that is is neccesary to put yourself and your child in this kind of situation. Why not speak to your child from a young age, explain to them why you are choosing something for them based on the circumstances you are i, if they ask for a certain , specific thing give it to them if availabe, simple as that, why must we go into this whole¨parenting must be this way¨ scenerio?
If i was in that position , i cant say i will follow a certain routine. I dont have this certain idea and am stuck with it, i guess i would be open to different ideas. One thing i do know is that i have this idea of what is wrong and right. Whne it comes to children, i would teach them to respect and be respected, to be unselfish, to be able to help others and think about others needs , as well as their own. I would want my kids to be happy , to be intelligent , and to know how to love and recieve love.
Its hard when we think about it. So may ideas so many options which one should we follow. Should we allow kids to be independent and get their way or should we out restrictions. Speaking formyself i dont believe kids should have there way 100 percent, they shouldnt be spoiled.They need to know the valause of some things, they need to know what it means to have something. Sure we can please them a little but honestly, i dont want my kids to end up being brats. i will teach my kids how to be humble and sweet and most importantly thankful.
With all that being said i do believe that parenting will come naturally, as it did with my mom whom i belive has done a great job. Parenting isnt a subject we need to learn and study for, its something we should love doing , enjoy doing and do it not always based on what a book says.
I read ¨When Parenting Theories Backfire¨ first off this article was very funny. Not only were the outcomes of following the technique funny, but so was the idea that someone would actually think something like this would work or be useful. First i would just like to say that i dont understand why many people think that when it comes to things such as parenting, which i know would be stressful, intimidating, and seem so hard , they believe that following what a book says will be the right way to go. Parenting as i said before should come naturally because you should do what you think is right, and have seen it as being right, based on the way you were raised and etc.
The ideas behind this technique is giving kids option, now im not saying you shouldnt give kids options, but really now? what in the world will choosing a yellow cup over a red one do to a 2 year old??? i find that hilarious actually. With that being said , i would think that parents would realize that this technique would be a recipe for disaster. Honestly yes kids are smart and comeone when given the option of two choices they will definetly go for the third unspoken of choice, the third choice you ha dno intention of bringing in and gives them the authroity you think you are fooling them into having.
i dont believe that is is neccesary to put yourself and your child in this kind of situation. Why not speak to your child from a young age, explain to them why you are choosing something for them based on the circumstances you are i, if they ask for a certain , specific thing give it to them if availabe, simple as that, why must we go into this whole¨parenting must be this way¨ scenerio?
Monday, May 17, 2010
H.W 56-Interviews and Survey Question
Part One -
Question 1- Do you believe that others expect a lot from you? If so, who does the most?
Question 2- What effects do these expectations have on you?
Question 3- Do you in return expect much from others?
Question 4- Where do you believe these expectations come from?
Question 5- Do you expect more from strangers or those close to you?
Part Two-
First Interview-
Q1 Answer: Know? not really Im older, i have expectations for my self. At your age , yes. My family expected Alot from me , more than anyone, i guess they knew my potential, they wanted me to show it when i really wans't.
Q2 Answer: The expectations from my family caused me to really question myself , and question what i wanted in the long run, it made me realize i couldnt just live for the now, as fun as it was, i needed to think about the future as well.
Q3 Answer: Its funny because when things are being expected from you , we usually dont like it, but truth is we expect from everyone, though we dont realize.
Q4 Answer: Im not really sure where it came from exactly, but i can say that its from everything round us. With just our everyday life we expect alot, so why not expect so much more from those around us?
Q5 Answer: Those close to me, its weird because sometimes we know someon so well, yet expect something we know they will never do .
Second Interview-
Q1 Answer: I think everyone expects alot from anyone , let it be my family,friends, co- workers ,or teachers. They are different expectations, but expectations non least.
Q2 Answer: Expectations can have either negative or positive effects. It just depends, such as in school, i was always expected to do good work, and it did, it helped me grow and keep myself at the pace i needed to be at.
Q3 Answer: Im not sure i expect alot from others due to being expected on from others. Im sure expectations are just a natural part of us, to make us feel ,hmm im not sure i want to say complete but it doesnt really make sence haha.
Q4 Answer: The expectations def come from what we see around us. T.v shows, ads, movies, our own ideas of how things should be.
Q5 Answer: I would say i expect more from those i dont know , because i just simply dont know what they will be capable or able to do for me or others depending on the kinds of relationship.
Third Interview-
Q1 Answer: I actually think that know that i am older people expect alot more from me, i have more responsibilities , so that to me means expectations grow. I would say that the person who has always and will always have the most expectations towards me is my mom, for sure.
Q2 Answer: I dont know, it has mostly been positive though , it has showed me what im capable of, im not sure if all expectations have lead to that, i must admit i have let some down.
Q3 Answer: I belive we expect from everyone because its just how things are, its weird but expectations are a way for us to shape or try to shape people into what we want them to be.
Q4 Answer: Like i aid before but adding on, i believe expectations come from what we want from others, the ways we want them to be.
Q5 Answer: im not sure, i would say i expect more from those i love, because i know them i want to make them happy, so in return i want them to do anything to make me happy, sometimes even if it means shaping into someone i want, messed up huh?
Part Three-
Based on the interviews i got this idea that expectations are these "dreams" one can say of what we want from others. On a bigger scale we can say that expectations are our ideas of the perfect person. Lets say we are in a relationship, we have this idea of a perfect man , we then turn this idea into an expectation of this "perfect man" being the complete gentelman, opening our doors etc. Its very unrealistic in situations such as these. From the interviews i also got this idea that whether it be people you just met or people you love expectations will arise. They might be major for those we know, and less for those we dont, we might expect dissapointment from one more than the other as well.
Part Four-
Survery Question :
Do you believe expectations lead to disapointment?
Question 1- Do you believe that others expect a lot from you? If so, who does the most?
Question 2- What effects do these expectations have on you?
Question 3- Do you in return expect much from others?
Question 4- Where do you believe these expectations come from?
Question 5- Do you expect more from strangers or those close to you?
Part Two-
First Interview-
Q1 Answer: Know? not really Im older, i have expectations for my self. At your age , yes. My family expected Alot from me , more than anyone, i guess they knew my potential, they wanted me to show it when i really wans't.
Q2 Answer: The expectations from my family caused me to really question myself , and question what i wanted in the long run, it made me realize i couldnt just live for the now, as fun as it was, i needed to think about the future as well.
Q3 Answer: Its funny because when things are being expected from you , we usually dont like it, but truth is we expect from everyone, though we dont realize.
Q4 Answer: Im not really sure where it came from exactly, but i can say that its from everything round us. With just our everyday life we expect alot, so why not expect so much more from those around us?
Q5 Answer: Those close to me, its weird because sometimes we know someon so well, yet expect something we know they will never do .
Second Interview-
Q1 Answer: I think everyone expects alot from anyone , let it be my family,friends, co- workers ,or teachers. They are different expectations, but expectations non least.
Q2 Answer: Expectations can have either negative or positive effects. It just depends, such as in school, i was always expected to do good work, and it did, it helped me grow and keep myself at the pace i needed to be at.
Q3 Answer: Im not sure i expect alot from others due to being expected on from others. Im sure expectations are just a natural part of us, to make us feel ,hmm im not sure i want to say complete but it doesnt really make sence haha.
Q4 Answer: The expectations def come from what we see around us. T.v shows, ads, movies, our own ideas of how things should be.
Q5 Answer: I would say i expect more from those i dont know , because i just simply dont know what they will be capable or able to do for me or others depending on the kinds of relationship.
Third Interview-
Q1 Answer: I actually think that know that i am older people expect alot more from me, i have more responsibilities , so that to me means expectations grow. I would say that the person who has always and will always have the most expectations towards me is my mom, for sure.
Q2 Answer: I dont know, it has mostly been positive though , it has showed me what im capable of, im not sure if all expectations have lead to that, i must admit i have let some down.
Q3 Answer: I belive we expect from everyone because its just how things are, its weird but expectations are a way for us to shape or try to shape people into what we want them to be.
Q4 Answer: Like i aid before but adding on, i believe expectations come from what we want from others, the ways we want them to be.
Q5 Answer: im not sure, i would say i expect more from those i love, because i know them i want to make them happy, so in return i want them to do anything to make me happy, sometimes even if it means shaping into someone i want, messed up huh?
Part Three-
Based on the interviews i got this idea that expectations are these "dreams" one can say of what we want from others. On a bigger scale we can say that expectations are our ideas of the perfect person. Lets say we are in a relationship, we have this idea of a perfect man , we then turn this idea into an expectation of this "perfect man" being the complete gentelman, opening our doors etc. Its very unrealistic in situations such as these. From the interviews i also got this idea that whether it be people you just met or people you love expectations will arise. They might be major for those we know, and less for those we dont, we might expect dissapointment from one more than the other as well.
Part Four-
Survery Question :
Do you believe expectations lead to disapointment?
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
H.W 55- Independent Research
Independent Research Question/Topic :
Part One:
Can the expectations your family has of you affect the relationship with your friends? Is this the cause of the ¨two sides¨of yourself ?
One thing i hear alot about is kids constantly saying what their parents want from them, the things they are expecting, how they want them to be. It can be about anything, be it school, types of friends, the people they date, anything, but what is true is that everyones parents have this idea of what there child should be, they have a dream of the great things their child will accomplish, after all they are our parents, they want whats best for us. But can this become overwhelming? Knowing that (i hope) such important peoples in our lives expect so much from us? Because from what i have heard, these expectations tend to be a bit over the top. How do we deal with the fact that our parents want so much from us? I guess the easiest solution is to put up this front, put up this mask and make them BELIEVE that what they are seeing is the true us. But then the problem rises, when do we drop this mask, do we show it to everyone? do we hide our true selves?
When it comes to family and friends many people say that this is where people have two sides to them. The one in which we please our family, and the one in which we please our friends. Honestly, its probably very rare when you hear someone say that what their parents want is exactly what their friends want from them and many times your parents might not even like who you hang out with. Again, we form this identity that fits with the people we want to hang out with, but that just bring up another question of , are these the people we want to hang out with?
Now, lets say your parents accept what you want to end up being in life, completly agree with everything you say and do, would that make it easier for us to be our one true self in front of everyone around us? Would that be a possible solution to this idea that we have two different selves. With that being said family and friends are the , i would stay, most important kinds of relationships we have. These are people that will be with us for a long time. So i guess its only logical that in away they will affect each other in either a positive or negative way.
Part Two-
Elvis-
I liked the idea you were going for. Like i said before, friendships and families are the strongest of the relationships, maybe the most important depending where in your life you are, so choosing between them is honestly one of the hardest things one can do, though i do believe , with my case anyways, family will probably come first,though i know i wont be in a situation in which i would have to choose. I like that you said you have a best friend who you consider family, theres that bond in which you know this one person is honestly your true friend, someone which ALOT of people dont have. Try changing your question from ¨how can anybody choose¨to ¨what causes one to choose¨ or maybe you can expand it to show the outcome of putting friends first : ¨what are some affects that putting friends first might have on your family life?¨ Overall your on a good start, hope it helped.
(I will do the second one soon, once my partner or someone else posts this)
Part 3 -
Possible revised Question : What are some affects expectations have on our relationships?
The first article talks about unrealistic expectations. These unrealistic expectations can be found in all our relationships , but where is it written that we MUST follow them? The article goes on to show how expectations come from ourselves, at even a young age. it also talks about how expectations, whether are directed towards us or we direct them towards others, affect us in a way in which we are self critical. Also these expectations can be due to bigger issues we might not be aware of. They go on to stay that there are realistic expectations, in which we realize that no one is perfect and we control our lives, no one elses.
Part One:
Can the expectations your family has of you affect the relationship with your friends? Is this the cause of the ¨two sides¨of yourself ?
One thing i hear alot about is kids constantly saying what their parents want from them, the things they are expecting, how they want them to be. It can be about anything, be it school, types of friends, the people they date, anything, but what is true is that everyones parents have this idea of what there child should be, they have a dream of the great things their child will accomplish, after all they are our parents, they want whats best for us. But can this become overwhelming? Knowing that (i hope) such important peoples in our lives expect so much from us? Because from what i have heard, these expectations tend to be a bit over the top. How do we deal with the fact that our parents want so much from us? I guess the easiest solution is to put up this front, put up this mask and make them BELIEVE that what they are seeing is the true us. But then the problem rises, when do we drop this mask, do we show it to everyone? do we hide our true selves?
When it comes to family and friends many people say that this is where people have two sides to them. The one in which we please our family, and the one in which we please our friends. Honestly, its probably very rare when you hear someone say that what their parents want is exactly what their friends want from them and many times your parents might not even like who you hang out with. Again, we form this identity that fits with the people we want to hang out with, but that just bring up another question of , are these the people we want to hang out with?
Now, lets say your parents accept what you want to end up being in life, completly agree with everything you say and do, would that make it easier for us to be our one true self in front of everyone around us? Would that be a possible solution to this idea that we have two different selves. With that being said family and friends are the , i would stay, most important kinds of relationships we have. These are people that will be with us for a long time. So i guess its only logical that in away they will affect each other in either a positive or negative way.
Part Two-
Elvis-
I liked the idea you were going for. Like i said before, friendships and families are the strongest of the relationships, maybe the most important depending where in your life you are, so choosing between them is honestly one of the hardest things one can do, though i do believe , with my case anyways, family will probably come first,though i know i wont be in a situation in which i would have to choose. I like that you said you have a best friend who you consider family, theres that bond in which you know this one person is honestly your true friend, someone which ALOT of people dont have. Try changing your question from ¨how can anybody choose¨to ¨what causes one to choose¨ or maybe you can expand it to show the outcome of putting friends first : ¨what are some affects that putting friends first might have on your family life?¨ Overall your on a good start, hope it helped.
(I will do the second one soon, once my partner or someone else posts this)
Part 3 -
Possible revised Question : What are some affects expectations have on our relationships?
The first article talks about unrealistic expectations. These unrealistic expectations can be found in all our relationships , but where is it written that we MUST follow them? The article goes on to show how expectations come from ourselves, at even a young age. it also talks about how expectations, whether are directed towards us or we direct them towards others, affect us in a way in which we are self critical. Also these expectations can be due to bigger issues we might not be aware of. They go on to stay that there are realistic expectations, in which we realize that no one is perfect and we control our lives, no one elses.
http://www.improvingyourworld.com/relationships/expectations_in_friendships_and_in_romantic_relationship_001437.html
This article starts with stating the obvious, expectations will be found in any and all kinds of relationships. They go on to say that any relationship is give and take, with this being said they go on to say what not fulfilling these expectations may lead to. In romantic relationships this may be break up, friendships might end etc. They say that
In a romantic relationship expectations generally go as follows:
- Each partner expects loyalty from the other.
- Each partner expects respect and love.
- Each partner expects to be a priority.
the following are some typical expectations found in a friendship:
- That you hang out.
- That you return calls.
- That you not stab one another in the back.
I dont really agree with the whole friendships expectations, returning calls and hanging out is not what i expect, but i guess it differs per person.
http://www.stresscure.com/health/expcting.html
This article i found very interesting. On a different approach they tell us that expectations are bad for us. Stress is something we all have , and expectations can cause stress in our lives. They say we have to realize that many times these expectations aren't realistic or fair, and only then will we free ourselves and feel better. Expectations can lead to : emotional distress, relationship conflicts, job related stress, stress of raising children, and so many more. It shows us that expectations can come from many places we wouldn't think of and affect us in ways we didn't believe or know possible.
Monday, May 10, 2010
H.W 54
ISFJ - "Conservator". Desires to be of service and to minister to individual needs - very loyal. 13.8% of total population. |
Introverted (I) 68.42% Extroverted (E) 31.58%
Sensing (S) 70.37% Intuitive (N) 29.63%
Feeling (F) 69.44% Thinking (T) 30.56%
Judging (J) 51.52% Perceiving (P) 48.48%
*Funny thing Ellen actually guessed these results for me , claiming this one fit me, she was right lol*
So i actually took the test twice. The first time it just didnt feel right, maybe it had to do with the fact that i would read the question then discuss with the people around me about why or how i chose what i did, the second time around i actually focused on what i was answering and what i was putting down, this kinda made me realize sum mitakes i made taking it the first time.
With that being said, the second time i took it i felt the results were pretty much accurate. It pretty much said that ISFJ were quiet, loyal ,friendly, responsible, considerate with how others feel, accurate ect. I guess, since Ellen guessed right , this does fit me perfectly. I find it funny though that all the percentages my results showed were very high except for judging which was fairly close. I like the fact that my feeling side beats my thinking side. Its funny because Ellen and i always laugh about how ¨soft¨we are, as she said in her blog , we cry during movies, i watch tru stories and see people cry and i cant help but tear up , and thought that is kinda corny, i like the fact that im sensitive. It helps me understand people , and put myself in their shoes beacuse as it says in my results, i always like to make sure those around me that i care for are happy. Its one thing about me thatmy mom always tells me to be stronger about. Im the type of person that if we have a issue , i will do anything in my power to make u feel better, to make you happy, even if in occasions im not. When i was younger i would do this alot, but as time went on i learned that i actually need to put myself first, if i dont no one will, and then people will just take advantage of me.
When it comes to being introverted, im not the kind of person that lets say will be drained after talking to someone for hours, but i am the kind of person that enjoys being alone. Its refreshing to just be alone and think about things that are going on , it helps me realize not only what i did wrong, but clear out my mind and just relax. Alone time, is me time, and honestly with a schedule such as the one we have been having in school , sometimes i need it more than other times, when im done though i feel better, especially if i took the time to fix a problem.
My sensing percentage i feel was on point. i follow what i feel and as weird as it sounds , if something feels right to me, i know its what i should do, im almost never wrong. I follow what my heart tells me to do, i follow what i feel ius right . The one thing that did sorta disapointment was the judging and percieving. I have never thought of myself as judging , but since the percentage was so close i guess i am sorta both. If someone does something i guess i do sorta criticize them but i think it has to do with how people around me are , like my aunts lol. They live for ¨bochinche¨ for criticizing people but in a friendly way, to make each other laugh. With that being said, my mom raised with this idea that doing the right thing , is simply right.
I looked at Ellens results, since we are close friends, and i pretty much agree with her aboit her thoughts on her results. They seemed to define Ellen , minus sum extreme parts. The same goes for Moes results, they were very accurate. This shows us that we can say the test is reliable. It pretty much does tell you where you fit on these different categories and where your percentage stands. Also i guess the test can be useful to maybe see the key pasrts of yourself. To understand who you are maybe?
Saturday, May 8, 2010
H.W 53-Survey Analysis
Yes, i took the survey.
Taking the survey was very easy for me. I found myself being completely honest with the answers i was giving , thinking about the way i would reply to each question was easy as well. While takin gthe survery, such as the family part, i found myself feeling lucky to be able to answer many of the questions with positive answers, such as you feel comfertable talking to your family about personal issues, you talk to an adult for more than 5 minutes, your family cares alot about how u feel etc. When it comes to my family i am completly thankful for them. My family is a huge group of people that care for each other, love each other and will do anything for each other. I have a close bond with many people in my family, such as my mom, sister and cousin. My mom , i know i have talked about her on here before, but she is the one person i know will always be there for me. The relationship my mom and i have is different from most, ,many people dont trust their parents, lie to them etc, thats not the case. I have 100 percent trust in my mom i tell her everything, i dont lie to her, shes like a bestfriends. Many kids arent lucky enought to have that. The same goes for the questions on friendships , they were easy to answer and by my answers i know i am lucky to be surrounded by the people i call my friends, they truyky know me , undertsand me and i know we will be friends for a lonngggg time. ¨
Over all the results were not shocking. I was honestly expecting something sort of like seeing that people really arent what they put off. One of the results that did stick out to me was that one of ¨you worry what others think of you¨ in which the percentage from yes to maybe was very small. Its interesting because many people say they dont care what people think of them, they are simply themselves, YET as we see in many of the results many students said that they confrom but want to be special, that they do stupid things in order to be accepted by some , and that they worry about what people think of them. It sorta does not make sence, even when it comes to friends people will mold themselves into being someone that other people will like , when they should be someone that they would like to be , or enjoy being. Also the percentage of ¨your tired of the people in school¨made me wonder about how true the friendships are. Its funny because i remember someone in our class claiming that everyone in the grade got along very well, as well as that they all accepted each other and were friends, the results how otherwise. 29 % said were tired of the people in school, so i guess this grade wide ¨freindship¨isnt as tru as people say it is, or try to fake it is.
It seems like when answering the questions of getting drunk and such and molding each other to be accepted shows us that people dont really have an idea of who they are. Im soo lost when it comes to people showing off the negative side of themselves. Why would i want someone to see me as sloppy and such.
The survery i looked at stated that 23.8% of students drunk alcohol before the age of 13 for the first time. It relates to our school survery because many people have said they had gotten drunk, In the case of the survery i dont undertsand why before the age of 13 kids have had more than a few sips of alcohol. Its just setting people up for a life in which partying and getting drunk, ultimatly lookin sloopy is accepted. I know drinking can be fun, but is it really fun to drink soo much that u pass out and cant relemeber a thing, is it fun to wake up with a nagover, and it is fun to be known as the one who needs to have a drink. I dont think so, i think people, teens especially, should have a better idea of how much alcohol they can take, and should take, because i know telling kids to stop drinking will just be impossible.
Taking the survey was very easy for me. I found myself being completely honest with the answers i was giving , thinking about the way i would reply to each question was easy as well. While takin gthe survery, such as the family part, i found myself feeling lucky to be able to answer many of the questions with positive answers, such as you feel comfertable talking to your family about personal issues, you talk to an adult for more than 5 minutes, your family cares alot about how u feel etc. When it comes to my family i am completly thankful for them. My family is a huge group of people that care for each other, love each other and will do anything for each other. I have a close bond with many people in my family, such as my mom, sister and cousin. My mom , i know i have talked about her on here before, but she is the one person i know will always be there for me. The relationship my mom and i have is different from most, ,many people dont trust their parents, lie to them etc, thats not the case. I have 100 percent trust in my mom i tell her everything, i dont lie to her, shes like a bestfriends. Many kids arent lucky enought to have that. The same goes for the questions on friendships , they were easy to answer and by my answers i know i am lucky to be surrounded by the people i call my friends, they truyky know me , undertsand me and i know we will be friends for a lonngggg time. ¨
Over all the results were not shocking. I was honestly expecting something sort of like seeing that people really arent what they put off. One of the results that did stick out to me was that one of ¨you worry what others think of you¨ in which the percentage from yes to maybe was very small. Its interesting because many people say they dont care what people think of them, they are simply themselves, YET as we see in many of the results many students said that they confrom but want to be special, that they do stupid things in order to be accepted by some , and that they worry about what people think of them. It sorta does not make sence, even when it comes to friends people will mold themselves into being someone that other people will like , when they should be someone that they would like to be , or enjoy being. Also the percentage of ¨your tired of the people in school¨made me wonder about how true the friendships are. Its funny because i remember someone in our class claiming that everyone in the grade got along very well, as well as that they all accepted each other and were friends, the results how otherwise. 29 % said were tired of the people in school, so i guess this grade wide ¨freindship¨isnt as tru as people say it is, or try to fake it is.
It seems like when answering the questions of getting drunk and such and molding each other to be accepted shows us that people dont really have an idea of who they are. Im soo lost when it comes to people showing off the negative side of themselves. Why would i want someone to see me as sloppy and such.
The survery i looked at stated that 23.8% of students drunk alcohol before the age of 13 for the first time. It relates to our school survery because many people have said they had gotten drunk, In the case of the survery i dont undertsand why before the age of 13 kids have had more than a few sips of alcohol. Its just setting people up for a life in which partying and getting drunk, ultimatly lookin sloopy is accepted. I know drinking can be fun, but is it really fun to drink soo much that u pass out and cant relemeber a thing, is it fun to wake up with a nagover, and it is fun to be known as the one who needs to have a drink. I dont think so, i think people, teens especially, should have a better idea of how much alcohol they can take, and should take, because i know telling kids to stop drinking will just be impossible.
Monday, May 3, 2010
H.W 52- Initial Theories of Human Relationships
So i guess ill start with what i believe when it comes to human relationships. When it comes to the way people act, i honestly dont get it. I guess it goes all the way back to how we are raised, I for one, was raised to have self respect as well as respect for others, to be able to defend my self when needed but to be reserved , something i guess i do well , being shy and all lol. With that being said, self respect is something that is needed when dealing with all these kinds of relationships , be it love, friendship, family etc the only problem is that i have noticed that when it comes to many of these relationships many, many people dont have this. They seem to not care if they have a ¨bad ¨image such as screaming, not talking, about their drunk days , constant parties and sleeping with many people, sure you can do these things if you want, but why make it so public, i believe that is one example of not having self respect, why would i want people to see me and know me with these negative images ? This goes back to a question ive been thinking about : why do we act this way? Why does it seem like now the most important thing for our images is the number of parties we have been to and things along those lines.
When it come sto friendship , a good friend is someone who is there for you always, someone who even though they might not understand you , they will try to help you, this person has to make you feel comfertable and as though you can trust them with anything. I think choosing friends has to be a ¨procees¨ one can say of choosing people that seem to be like you , or can rekate to you. All my life i have never been one to have more than 10 good friends, and im happy about that. These people are the true people i know will always be there for me and thats important. I dont think its important to have a HUGE group of friends , in my case in school i have 3 close friends and i believe that to be perfect, i dont see why i must show off the amount of people that like me like most do. Once again why is that ? Why do we feel this sence of power when we are surrounded by many people? I guess we can say that thereason we like showing off number is like money the more yiou have the better you are. The more friends you have the more people will think you are cool , i guess.
Acting towards other people should be once again , with some sence of respect. Im not saying you should be all formal with your friends etc but you should have some kind off respect towards them , and anyone. Many people seem not to have this, we see constant bullying, we see constant mockery , arguing, fights, things that make absolutely no sence, but bring people attention. Attention i think is what many people seek when it comes to human relationships, i think everyone wants this, some make it so much more obvious than others, as i bet many of us have seen in S.O.F while others do it in a less noticible way , just with there group of friends or family, not the whole audience in front of them.
From friends also comes the idea of love. When it comes to this part of human relationships once again i believe self respect and respect for the other person. I dont think a relationship can work without any of these. Loyalty and trust also must go. When it comes to relationships i dont see the point in messing around with other peoples feelings, making people think you like them, going out with someone you know you wont be with for more than a week, whats the point? Why not be with someone , or find someone that you know will make you happy and you know will love you? Why settle for a one night stand, or for being used by this person?
These small thoughts on the topics i guess are more things i live by, the way i believe some things should be , and what i have been taught. With that being said our life is always going to be hving to deal with some sort of relationships so its something that we need to know how to do, im not saying the way i do things is the way that is one hundred percent right, but its the way that has worked for me and has made me happy with myself.
When it come sto friendship , a good friend is someone who is there for you always, someone who even though they might not understand you , they will try to help you, this person has to make you feel comfertable and as though you can trust them with anything. I think choosing friends has to be a ¨procees¨ one can say of choosing people that seem to be like you , or can rekate to you. All my life i have never been one to have more than 10 good friends, and im happy about that. These people are the true people i know will always be there for me and thats important. I dont think its important to have a HUGE group of friends , in my case in school i have 3 close friends and i believe that to be perfect, i dont see why i must show off the amount of people that like me like most do. Once again why is that ? Why do we feel this sence of power when we are surrounded by many people? I guess we can say that thereason we like showing off number is like money the more yiou have the better you are. The more friends you have the more people will think you are cool , i guess.
Acting towards other people should be once again , with some sence of respect. Im not saying you should be all formal with your friends etc but you should have some kind off respect towards them , and anyone. Many people seem not to have this, we see constant bullying, we see constant mockery , arguing, fights, things that make absolutely no sence, but bring people attention. Attention i think is what many people seek when it comes to human relationships, i think everyone wants this, some make it so much more obvious than others, as i bet many of us have seen in S.O.F while others do it in a less noticible way , just with there group of friends or family, not the whole audience in front of them.
From friends also comes the idea of love. When it comes to this part of human relationships once again i believe self respect and respect for the other person. I dont think a relationship can work without any of these. Loyalty and trust also must go. When it comes to relationships i dont see the point in messing around with other peoples feelings, making people think you like them, going out with someone you know you wont be with for more than a week, whats the point? Why not be with someone , or find someone that you know will make you happy and you know will love you? Why settle for a one night stand, or for being used by this person?
These small thoughts on the topics i guess are more things i live by, the way i believe some things should be , and what i have been taught. With that being said our life is always going to be hving to deal with some sort of relationships so its something that we need to know how to do, im not saying the way i do things is the way that is one hundred percent right, but its the way that has worked for me and has made me happy with myself.
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